Monday, August 11, 2008

Feed me, Seymour

Zucchini grows in the night. Or, to bastardize/paraphrase a John Lennon quote (may the man rest in peace), "Zucchini is what happens when you're busy doing other things."

I planted 5 seeds--one each--in those little net-wrapped peat plugs a few months back; all of them sprouted, but I selected the 3 hardiest plants to transfer to the ground. I've never grown zucchini before; pumpkins, yes. Once, as a kid, as a sort of summertime experiment. You know the story--stick a few seeds in the ground, water once in a while, long-assed vines begin to travel hither & yon, and--bam! A few big pumpkins, just in time for Halloween carving.

So that, really, was the extent of my veggie-growing experience. This year, however, my roommate expressed that he wanted to start a garden, so we did. I requested zucchini.

I was warned.

Run, is what they all said. Very fast. And far.

I scoffed. Good Lord, it's a plant, after all. How much damage can zucchini do? Besides, I adore zucchini. I eat it every summer until I truly cannot stand the thought of ingesting even ONE MORE freakin' squash. Until the next year rolls around, at which point the addictive cycle renews itself.

So. We currently have 3 enormous Audrey II-like zucchini plants securely rooted in their patch of organic soil, soaking up the full sun and every ounce of water they get. Each time I go 'round back to check them, they've produced more. Now, I make every attempt to extract the zucchini when it's still small and innocent and pluckable and artily-fartily teeny-weeny-gourmet and easy to cope with, but regrettably, I've neglected this for a few days and just this afternoon, was met with some seriously overlooked Monster Zucchinis that more or less resemble the Hindenburg.

They are not zucchinis, they are naturally-occurring dirigibles. Yes, I know. I was warned.

And I laughed at them all. They're zucchini, I said. Surely, you jest.

Ah, but no.

Clippers poised, I went in.

I wrestled the thick, viney stalks and clipped them off, all of those two-days-neglected monstrosities, and brought them in. They're draining now, rinsed, in the sink; I just sauteed a few, chopped, with a little olive oil, salt, pepper & garlic and had it for dinner. But I barely made a dent in this latest harvest.

So right now, I'm on the sofa, recovering. And, when I recover enough energy to do so, I'm gonna hunt down a recipe for zucchini bread.

Feed me, Seymour
Feed me all night long

'Cause if you feed me, Seymour

I can grow up big and strong...

2 comments:

NW Nature Nut said...

Oh, I have a good zucchini bread recipe if you need one. I have a round yellow summer squash that is in full production right now. I can't keep up and I made a few new things the last couple of nights. First, I picked a handful of the blossoms (which sell for 50cents a piece at the farmers market!!!) and cut little slits and stuffed them with peppered goat cheese, dipped them in beaten egg, rolled them in flour and sauted in olive oil. Everything is good fried, right? Last night: sauted squash, green beans, and garlic, boiled some potatoes and layered them in and dish and sprinked with cheese and baked. Yum!

OneWuff said...

Aw, man! Those both sound delicious...actually, I have had fried zucchini blossoms--in a restaurant in Minneapolis, actually. VERY tasty, but your version sounds downright indulgent. YUM is right!